My morning startson the corner

A: “So, I came off coffee for a while and I felt much better. I mean, you’ve made and it’s there so I’ll have some”.

B: ” Yeah, you were better when you were off it”.

A: ” But I’ll have some”.

B: ” Sure, sure. I mean it’s right here”.

A: ” I’ll stop tomorrow”.

B: “Yeah, yeah. Go off it tomorrow”.

… Oh dear.

A perfect cocktail menu for a 1920′s party

We ran a murder mystery night for about 15 friends a year or so ago. The theme was prohibition era Chicago so we needed to serve appropriately.

Running the bar was a bit of craic though cleaning the flat was a trial the following morning (example – cocktail sausages in my shoes and prawns between books on shelves).

But, it was a good menu. So for the good of the interweb here it is:

 

Cocktail List

3 rounds of cocktails with the following choices:

1. Gin Gimlet or Watermelon Martini
2. Bloody Mary or Moskow Mule
3. Whiskey Sour or Seabreeze

Round one:

Gimlet (Gin and lime)

• 2 Measures Hendricks Gin
• 2 Measures Lime Cordial
• 0.5 Measure Soda Water

Method:

1. Pour the ingredients into a mixing glass with ice cubes.
2. Stir well.
3. Strain into a chilled cocktail glass.

OR

Watermelon Martini (vodka and watermelon) (make a jug)

• 1 cup watermelon juice (press watermelon through a sieve or cheesecloth)
• 1/2 cup (4 oz) Vodka
• 1/4 cup simple syrup (sugar)
• juice of 1 lime
• 3 tablespoons salt (optional)
• 3 tablespoons sugar (optional)
• ice
• Watermelon slices, for garnish (optional)

Method:

1. Mix together the sugar and salt if using.
2. Wet the rim of a chilled martini glass with a piece of watermelon. Dip the rim into the
3. sugar and salt mixture. Repeat for other glass.
4. Place the watermelon juice, vodka, lime juice, and simple syrup into a cocktail shaker.
5. Top with ice. Shake well.
6. Pour contents through strainer into martini glasses.
7. Garnish with a wedge of watermelon if desired.

 

Round two:

Bloody Mary (vodka and juice)

Bloody Mary recipe as taught by the New York School of Bartending:

• 1 oz. to 1½ oz. (30-45 ml) vodka in a highball glass filled with ice.
• Fill glass with tomato juice
• 1 dash celery salt
• 1 dash ground black pepper
• 1 dash Tabasco sauce
• 2-4 dashes Worcestershire sauce
• 1/8 tsp. horseradish (pure, never creamed)
• Dash of lemon juice

Method:

1. Build over cubed ice.
2. Garnish with celery stalk.

 

OR

Moskow Mule (vodka and ginger beer)

Method:

1. Pour 1 1/2 ounces vodka and the juice of half a lime over ice cubes in a water glass
2. Fill with ginger beer.
3. Stir and garnish with a slice of lime.

 

 

Round three:
Whiskey Sour (whiskey and egg)

(If possible replace the whiskey with Peruvian pisco)

You will need:

• Shaker & Cocktail strainer
• Martini/Rocks glasses
• 50ml/1.5oz whisk(e)y of your choice
• 25ml/0.75oz lemon juice
• 12.5ml/0.4oz sugar syrup
• Dash of bitters
• 25ml egg white (optional)
• Lemon slice and cherry to garnish

 
Method:

1. In an ice-filled mixing glass add all liquid ingredients
2. Place the Boston tin on top of the mixing glass ensuring a good seal
3. Shake hard until frost forms on the outside of the Boston tin
4. Strain into either a chilled martini glass or ice-filled tumbler/rocks glass
5. Run a piece of lemon zest around the rim of the glass to release the fragrance
6. Garnish with a fresh lemon slice and a cherry
7. If using the egg white (which you should if you’re going near this drink)  make sure it is really really fresh. This gives the drink a frothy lightness which brings it to life

OR
Seabreeze (vodka – fruit)

• 2 Measures Russian Standard Vodka
• 4 Measures Cranberry Juice
• 2 Measures Grapefruit Juice

Method:

1. Build over cubed ice.

Shopping List

• Cocktail shaker and strainer
• Gin (Branded – Hendricks, Blue Sapphire)
• Rye whiskey (Kentucky Bourbon at a stretch)
• Angostura Bitters
• Tomato Juice x 2
• Cranbery juice x 2
• Orange juice x 2
• Grapefruit juice x 2
• Soda water x 2
• Sparkling water x 2
• A *lot* of limes
• 8 x Lemons
• 5 x Grapefruit
• Cherries
• Watermelon x 2
• Tabasco sauce
• Worcestershire sauce
• Black pepper
• Celery
• Horseradish
• Eggs
• Cocktail sticks
• Ice

Cuts, strikes and such…

Again, I’m trying to my thoughts together in one place.

I’ve been on strike a few times this year and I was on the big march in London yesterday. I feel instinctively that this is the ethically correct choice but, if I’m to argue for it (which I must as I’m challenged on these choices regularly) I need to figure out why I’m doing this. So…

Here I am trying to get my thoughts together. Note that, for the most part, I’m comparing my position with an equivalent in the private sector. When I talk about career progression obviously I’m limiting the job families that discussion pertains to.

1. The public sector is a not a safe playground protected from the recession.
   
   I keep being told that I “don’t know how hard it is out there“, that I have “been given immunity from this economic climate“… and so on. We have taken a hit like “the rest of you“. That’s clearly evident as my colleagues are made redundant around me, my pay is frozen and my pension already reduced (note that it was already renegotiated in 2008).  It’s just silly and uninformed to state that nobody in the public sector is feeling this squeeze or suffering from the impact of the recession.
2. The public sector is not a commercial company – it’s an essential service.

   It can’t take hits like the private sector can (and should) because everything it does is essential (or should be – there are, of course, activities that should be lessened in scale or stopped altogether – I would never argue that there aren’t).

   This is a crude comparison I admit, hospitals need to stay open and working to a certain standard / web design agencies don’t. A capitalist society should go through periods of boom and bust – commercial services like pubs, web start-ups, estate agents and banks should be allowed to prosper and fail accordingly.

   But it is irrational to assume that public services should grow and fail in the same manner. These services are public and not private because we need them to keep going no matter what – that’s the basic function of government and its associated services.

   I’m not stating that spending should not be reduced during recessions – it should of course. But there is a core service that is essential and the quality of that service is now lessened. That means worse healthcare, more kids with nothing to do, less police, more potholes in the roads, increased crime and worse education. And so on and on and on. That’s not okay.

   A friend of mine yesterday phrased it very well – “When a toilet is cleaned in a hotel it is to earn that hotel more money / when a toilet is cleaned in a hospital it is simply because that toilet needs to be clean“.

3. There is deal – less pay and progression for better security and pension.To follow on from the previous point – those working in the commercial world should also be allowed to prosper and fail in times of boom and bust. Have routine nights out and expensive holidays paid for by your company, have your company car and have your bonuses. But accept that, with these things, comes an greater risk of redundancy. That’s the deal.So there’s a trade off. I have, to a degree and only for now, more job security and a better pension that my equivalents in the private sector. (I also feel more enthusiasm about the value of my job to society but that’s perhaps a tangential point). But with that security comes some trades.
   • I have less opportunity for progression than my equivalents in the private-sector. A specialist in the public sector (for the most part) will be unable to progress past a certain pay scale. So I’ll earn less in than my friends who continue to progress.
   • I cannot renegotiate my contract. I’m on a national payscale and that’s that.
   • I don’t get perks. No beers after work or parties or bonuses. Now I’m told that commercial companies won’t provide these when times are tough – fair enough. But they will return when times are good again.
   • I am highly specialised in a relatively small industry. I can’t jump jobs and companies. I work in a university – there aren’t very many of them.

   Now that’s all okay – I made my choices. But so did those in the private sector.

   I’m told on Twitter that I should just leave and look for work elsewhere rather than take strike action. I do see the logic of this but it’s not one that works in the public service. As said, it’s an essential service. It’s suggested to me that staff of quality “should look elsewhere <because> if there’s nobody of worth left, Government will improve conditions to draw you back”. Now that’s sound logic in a capitalist society and in a commercial role. But we can’t think like that because we can’t allow our services to have no one of quality. A generation of poor teachers (for example) doing damage while the government tries to draw them back back (as it did relatively recently with homeshare schemes and such) will have terrible consequences for society.

   So, for the reasons that I chose to work where I work I don’t want to leave. So it’s a long-term thing.

   Which is where the pensions argument comes in. People being hit by the pension reduction now made an agreement decades ago with their employer that they would work for less than their private sector counterparts in return for a better pension – essentially a deferred wage. If the government reneges on that deal not only is it morally wrong it also makes the public sector far less attractive to quality graduates in the future. Even if the government does try to draw teachers (to continue with the example) back – the employer won’t be trusted to hold to that promise in the long term. And by ‘long term’ I mean decades. So with little short term reward and less and less long term reward – it’s a less attractive deal.

   Now I’m also told that none of this should matter because health, education, etc. are vocations and we shouldn’t care about money. First off, that’s easy to say and secondly that’s true… To a point… but we have all begun to weigh our extrinsic motivators to do social good against the intrinsic motivator of a good reward for working.

 

 

…. An additional to the post…

To add to that… I do understand that, in the private sector, if you’re unhappy with working conditions you go elsewhere. I’ve done so in the private sector and do understand how it works.

But please understand that things work differently in the public sector. Partially for the practical reasons I mention above but also because of desire and motivation.

When I talk about “quality staff” I’m not only referring to skills, I’m talking about a desire to have a job in the service of society.
Again, I’ll use a teacher as an example again. A ‘good’ teacher would rather not teach in a private school. That’s not where they do the most good. But, if pushed enough, they’ll have to switch for purely financial reasons.

This isn’t okay. Good teachers who care in private schools while those who can’t find work elsewhere keep teaching the less wealthy? Not a good thing surely?

Please understand that many of us striking yesterday did not just lose pay to protect our pensions. We’re worried about broader social consequence.

Nappy Cake

A friggin’ awesome cake composed of nappies, blankets, champagne and such constructed by my wife’s workmates… Ridiculous but supercool

Av or not to AV?

Well… AV clearly.

It’s not good enough. It doesn’t offer a big enough change from the current clearly unfair and archaic system. But that’s not a reason to vote ‘no’ to it.

There’s the possibility of creating a precedent that it can’t be changed again and frankly, with the absence of true Proportional Representation as a choice, it will have to do.

I’ll head to the polls shortly and I’m very disappointed.

It does look like the ‘no’ vote will win. Which I find very disappointing. Cameron says we should vote ‘no’ because we’re too stupid to understand the concept of making a list in order of preference. Others say we should vote ‘no’ to punish Nick Clegg; not realising that it’s a vote for Cameron and that, of course, this is a referendum not an election. The ‘yes’ campaign is based around more complex (not that complex really) ideas like democracy, allowing smaller parties a seat at the table, and a move away from tactical voting. Which, it seems, are too difficult for most voters to consider.

Blubbing like a girl at Bieber

I’m wondering if being more easily played, emotionally, by media is a sign of getting older…

It’s very odd movies, books and comics that previously engaged me certainly now have me angry, regretful and brimming with sorrow along with the protagonists. Even shows I’ve seen before, I now rewatch with increased emotional attachment. Wesley making the hard choices in Angel, Bartlett’s struggle with MS in the West Wing, and so on and on. I don’t know if I can risk watching Band of Brothers again. I’d need a bucket for the tears and a bottle of gin to see me through.

My heart skips a beat in Toy Story 3 when the toys might finally meet their end and squeezes tight when Lotzo’s lonely origin is revealed.

I find myself welling up at the Doctor Who Christmas Special for feck’s sake. Some ice maiden with a good voice pelts out an operatic number about lonliness as she dies and I’m grasping for the Kleenex.

I’m worried that soon I’ll be on my knees sobbing if every contestant doesn’t quite win the million.

What on earth is going on?

Micro-lending at Kiva.org

www.kiva.org

So, I’ve signed up to this micro-lending website. Basically folk in countries that aren’t doing quite so well as we & who can’t arrange local financing for relatively small amounts of money (e.g. $1k) are identified by local Kiva agents and are set up on this website. Then people like you and me can loan fairly small amounts of money (e.g. 20 quid). Which, one-by-one isn’t a big deal but altogether and we’ve helped them start a shop or buy power tools so they can be a tradesman or whatever.

Now, I like this idea enough that I’ve given it money. So let that be said before I criticise. And I think you should give it money too. I believe in the web as being an enabling tool – one that can create direct networks of support and transaction (EBay, Gumtree, etc.) and I think a move toward this being a global network that actually helps people can only be a good thing.

But… it’s boring. And boring doesn’t sell.

Ultimately I’ve just given a few quid to a website in a once-off deal that I won’t go back to. I do, honestly as I’m easily drawn into the narratives of marketing, feel better about myself by knowing that my money has gone to specific person (there’s a photo and a name and I will, I imagine, soon be hearing of her success) that to a faceless upload button. But, in reality, that faceless upload button does provide money to an NGO that I trust (let’s say Amnesty) that will make certain that my money has an impact.

But… it’s boring. I think it should include interest and I think my account should gain that interest. I have to admit (and this is perhaps me …looking at it from a games perspective I guess) – at the moment it is really just a once-off donation . I’ve basically given money to a website and, while it has more human interest than most charity donations, I don’t really feel compelled to log back in a see how my money is doing. Were I able to gain even a very small interest (even if I couldn’t personally withdraw that interest – i.e. it needed to stay in the Kiva ‘pool’), I’d give a lot time and focus and really work out which local agents were more active and skilled, etc. Basically if there was a more active element to my involvement – I’d be inclined to put more time and money into it.

Or… I dunno… even a point-scoring system of some kind.

Ideas?

Staff development hell

I find it very difficult on these courses sometimes… The presenters ask these glaringly obvious questions and I, and I imagine most other people sitting there, fight the urge to just snap and present the right answer to Mrs.Turdinboffer up front… Just to moving the fucking thing along!

And the flip-charts… the endless fucking flip-charts and post-it notes, “Ooooh… please everyone form groups and write things that you already know about on pieces of paper… why?… cos I’m a fuckwit and can’t come up with decent material and this will pad a good hour or so and I get to call it constructivist learning and charge you 300quid for the privilege… That’s why”….

That’s why…

I know it’s nice for everyone to contribute and I know it stretches out the duration and makes everyone feel like valuable ‘participants’ rather than interested ‘attendees’ but…

BUT… I am here to bloody well learn from you. If I knew it all already why in the name of Merciful Zeus would I be here at all???? Aren’t you the goddamned expert and we the thricedamned novices??? Why would I kill precious hours of my like with this interminable bollocks… waiting for you to say “anything else? What else can we put on the chart?”…. While you wait for us to give you some point so fucking readily apparent that no one think of suggesting it. “Yes!” I scream in my head. “Yes! The grass is green! The sky is up! And you, madam, are a fuck-knuckle!”.

You see all sorts… at Sourced with Billy

So my conference in sunny Nottingham begins here… a rainy afternoon in St.Pancras… A slight anxiety has struck. Looking at the programme I’ve realised that, not only is my presentation in the Lucan of the conference – a good ten minutes walk through forest from the main event, but also that I am scheduled in parallel with Google… Fuckin’ A.

With the tube strike looming overhead, it seemed best to leave plenty of time… And what better way to while away that time than with wine and surfed meat? Ala French-style.

A mate of mine introduced me to Sourced Market in St. Pancras a few weeks ago and it’s really a find. Restless, tired and fidgety – I headed up to the counter. The lady behind spotted my worry and motioned to a seat tapping my shoulder gently – “You sit down, my lovely, and I’ll sort you out”. I ordered a pate platter and a small bottle of whatever wine she recommended. “A large wine or small?”. Large, I think today. “Good boy”. Delicious pates, crisp breads, sharp gherkins and a mellow merlot. (See photo and note the conspicuous and affected placement of Wired).

And what a wonderful artery-clogging meal it was. Spent admiring the the tableau of humanity that is a major international train station. A group of French girls passed wheeling old-style bicycles, effortlessly and impossibly cool, replete with stylish macs and stripey jumpers. All they were missing were garlands of garlic and clove cigarettes (which I’m sure were lit immediately upon reaching the street). A lost-looking young girl heaving about a giant suitcase. A group of middle-aged Frenchmen running past, pausing briefly to enquire after my pate. A balding woman in a long wizard’s robe and hood. And an anxious man (at least, I *think* a man) dressed in an alarmingly short polka dot slip, a pair of oversized black hiking shoes and a Barbour waxed jacket (a good choice given the weather). His short hair at odds with his heavily made-up face and his hand worrying the handle of a La Senza bag overflowing with lingerie.

I love whiling away time in airports, stations and such. You see all sorts.

Walking to walk by St.Paul’s

DSC_0871_DxO, originally uploaded by Waxy Dan.

Ever since bastarding First Capital Connect decided, in their malicious conspiracy with London Underground, to fuck my shit up by closing Blackfriars for a million years and add 20 minutes to my commute (more on the home leg of my journey)… I’ve had to walk between stations.

It’s not all bad though – I stroll along the Thames for a a few minutes, which makes me feel very much a part of city… Under the rail bridge, by the Tate Modern and a jolly strut up the steps of the Milleniun Bridge to St.Paul’s. It’s a wonderful view – a wonderful design that once, before the bridge was in place, must have been a stunning entry to the city from the river.

It’s not all boring either – this morning I got to see some cops rugby tackle a Scandinavian midget who was foaming at the mouth right onto his new leisure wear.