How does a gentleman dine?

I’m sure you’ve often asked yourself this vital question. Well, I’ll show you:

Hell yes.

And then I get gout

What do you do with a night to yourself?

Me? I go to a market during the day (http://www.broadwaymarket.co.uk/) and buy a thick cut of rump steak as large as my head. 

I introduce this slab of succulence in passing to some heat on a griddle. “Hello Mr. Griddle”. “Hello, Mr.Steak” they say jovially as Mr.Steak takes centre stage. Then I serve a backing band of asparagus, pear and rocket salad with a sherry & balsamic vinegar dressing. I melt an exceptional gorgonzola over the meat and tuck in.

I follow this with a leisurely cigarette or two and, some time later, a cheese board with some apples. To finish the night I put the beer and wine away and round the repast off with a double whiskey on ice with some single-estate Peruvian chocolate.

All to the sounds and visions of Korean ultraviolent movies.

And then I get gout.

This is what my evening looks like: